Between October 2021 and March 2022, the 40 competing entries for the Eurovision Song Contest 2022 selected their entries for the competition. We break down the FIVE best & worst songs amongst these.
In total 29 National Selections took place to select entries for the 66th Eurovision Song Contest, meaning entries from all 29 have been considered for this list. The only rule is that entries that competed in Eurovision 2022 are not eligible, for obvious reasons.
5 – Worst
Viktor Apostolovski – Superman
From North Macedonia’s National Selection, Za Evrosong, comes Viktor Apostolovski’s entry, Superman, which somehow ended up at an astonishing 2nd place…. This entry takes the idea of a novelty act, but without any of the quality these usually entail, feeling like a throwback to Eurovision of the late 2000s. It’s by no means a good song, in any regard. However, compared to some of the later worst songs on this list, it’s somewhat listenable.
5 – Best
Anders Bagge – Bigger Than The Universe
The first entry on our Best list comes from Melodifestivalen‘s second place finisher, Bigger than the Universe, for Sweden. Beating out Hold Me Closer by 20 televote points, Bigger than the Universe, was a fan favourite during the National Selection season, with Anders Bagge delivering an inspiration pop anthem, which brought everyone together.
Bagge, a sufferer of stage fright, also, in line with the song’s lyrics, overcame his fears to perform this song, and he did it spectacularly, especially during the Melodifestivalen Final.
4 – Worst
Trollfest – Dance Like a Pink Flamingo
While not the worst National Selection this year, Norway’s Melodi Grand Prix was certainly the most disappointing, in comparison to last year’s offerings. Chief among the disappointments was yet another novelty entry, this time from Trollfest, that suffers from the exact same problems as, the aforementioned, Superman, but mixed in with a horrible rock arrangement and random screaming (obviously inspired by Måneskin’s 2021 victory) and you get something far far worse.
4 – Best
Rigoberta Bandini – Ay Mamá
Like with the previous Best entry, Ay Mamá came second in its selection, which was Spain’s Benidorm Fest. Ay Mamá was the favourite to win, in not just the weeks leading up to Benidorm Fest, but also during and following Benidorm Fest, when a huge wave of public anger toward RTVE erupted, when Chanel’s SloMo (who ended up coming 3rd in Eurovision) won.
Ay Mamá, itself, is an ode to motherhood and an anthem of the power of the mother, including the power of the breast, and what a mother can deliver a child. Mixed in with a synth-pop arrangement and a lot of pre-recorded backing vocals, and you have a Eurovision classic in your hands.
3 – Worst
Emily Roberts – Soap
What happens when you already have a terrible song that is only made worse by a terrible live performance? Well, you get, Emily Roberts’ Soap from Germany 12 Points. Production-wise, Germany 12 Points was easily the worst National Selection of the year, making nearly every major mistake that NDR could’ve possibly make, and on-top of that, all 6 entries were pretty poor – with the winner coming last at Eurovision 2022! However, Emily Roberts suffered the indignity of coming last in that field, with her entry, Soap.
Soap is somewhat of a masterpiece among bad music, as it seems like it was designed to be as bad as it possibly could be. Not only does it feature mind-numbingly dull production and arrangement, but it also features such lyrical triumphs as “It’s been a day and 7 weeks, and 4 years since you left / I gotta wash my brain with Soap / Got your taste in the back of my Throat / Boy we used to be so Dope“… there’s more, but I think it’s safer just to leave it there. Her live vocals didn’t disappoint this thoroughly awful song, either, as they are just about some of the worst vocals I’ve heard for a song this easy to sing. And then… to add insult to injury, during the live performance, Emily Roberts managed to forget the lyrics in the second verse, instead improvising by speaking “Woah…. try not to flinch(?)… wow…. damn… how??“. Soap is truly going down in history as one of the worst attempts at a Eurovision song, but… somehow, there’s worse on this list.
3 – Best
Bess – Ram Pam Pam
Finland’s Uuden Musiikin Kilpailu was easily one of, if not the, strongest selection shows, this year, delivering several songs that could have all delivered very good results in Eurovision (many perhaps surpassing Finland’s actual 21st position)… Chief among them was 2nd place finisher, Ram Pam Pam, by Bess, which was an all Finnish dance anthem, with lots of movement, choreography and an incredibly catchy chorus. This song was made for Eurovision and could’ve easily reached the Top 10!
2 – Worst
Basti – Running
From Una voce per San Marino comes Basti’s Running, an extremely generic attempt at soul techno-pop, which not only sounds about 10 years dated, but is also just flat-out awful, in itself. Even if this had competed in Eurovision at the height of the genre’s popularity, we’re looking at last place in the Semi Finals. Production wise, the song is a mess, especially as the producer tries really hard to emulate extremely complex production, arriving at an extremely uncoordinated result. Performance wise, Basti chose to wear the spiritual winner of the Barbara Dex Award for National Selections, as it’s just about the worst thing I’ve seen in a Eurovision performance. Even if the song was good, the costume itself would hinder it still. Basti’s vocals aren’t anywhere near as bad as Emily Roberts’ but they don’t particularly suit the song he is singing and he tends to over sing at several points during the course of the song.
2 – Best
Sangiovanni – Farfalle
Even competing in the Sanremo Music Festival is an achievement, with the selection occupy the title of the “most prestigious” song contest in the world. The festival is full to the brim with fantastic songs, all of which could have granted Italy a great result in Eurovision… however, the one we wish to mention is Sangiovanni’s Farfelle, which finished 5th place. The song was an instant hit with Eurovision fans, which apart from the eventual winner, Brividi, was, overall, the community’s favourite to win Sanremo.
The song is an upbeat pop-dance song, which is about the nervousness (or butterflies) someone feels when they first fall in love. It also has the ring of pain throughout, as while it’s upbeat, you can tell that it’s hurting Sangiovanni, and his raspy Italian singing voice just adds to this, making the song a whole lot deeper and complex. It’s really good.
1 – Worst
Sasha Bognibov – I Just Had Sex With Your Ex
From Moldova comes our worst entry on this list, Sasha Bognibov’s I Just Had Sex With Your Ex, which is perhaps the worst song I’ve ever heard in my lifetime. With production that sounds like it was made with a single Casio keyboard, and a cheap one at that, and vocals that are, by far, some of the worst I’ve ever heard… it would be hard to beat I Just Had Sex With Your Ex to the worst song, this year, by any margin. We haven’t even mentioned the lyrics, but I think it might be better if you just experienced the pure “songwriter talent” there for yourself.
1 – Best
Alina Pash – Shadows of Forgotten Ancestors
While it’s inclusion on this list may be contentious, as it in fact won it’s National Selection, it wasn’t actually selected to go to Eurovision for a number of long and complicated reasons, instead the 2nd place Kalush Orchestra were sent, who ended up winning the whole of Eurovision 2022, anyway. However, Ukraine’s Vidbir winner, is still technically a National Selection song, not a Eurovision song, so is eligible for the list… and yes, it wins it by a landslide.
Shadows of Forgotten Ancestors is easily one of the best songs written for Eurovision and would’ve with no doubt won the 2022 contest, with likely a higher score than even Kalush Orchestra managed. It’s just a beautiful song about Ukraine and their past, while also facing the future. It’s fantastic!
